Tuesday, April 7, 2009

This is the new General Motors?

GM is back baby! The threat of bankruptcy has spurred the General into new areas of innovation. It has teamed up with Segway, the makers of two wheeled vehicles for lazy asses and mall cops to unveil The Personal Urban Mobility and Accessibility, or the PUMA.

Feel The Rush! The 2010 Pontiac Sunfire?
The PUMA will revolutionize the way we get around a city. For just 1/3 the cost of a regular car and at 1/25 the vehicle, anyone can get the rush that the elderly feel driving around in their scooters. Advances in technology include sensors that would automatically avoid obstacles such as pedestrians and other cars and therefore never crash. Hey that's the type of technology that would help move a Pontiac Vibe, but using the marketing savvy that has taken them to bankruptcy GM would rather put it in a cart for meter maids and douchebags.

Obviously logic dictates that the best call for a company on the brink of failure is to align itself with another company on the brink of failure? Like a monkey throwing crap it hopes that something it throws sticks to the wall.

The PUMA reaches top speeds of 35m/h. We will have to wait and see if a car with sensors driven by a person filled with smug self importance can survive a collision with a garbage truck.

This can open up brand new business areas for GM to exploit. Why not get into rickshaws? They're a clean vehicle and a great way for GM to employ all those people their stupidity has thrown out of work.

Images courtesy of akc and The Globe and Mail.

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